Perhaps we live in a world that is more cynical than ever.
Everything worth labelling is given a “post” before it, as we try to understand the art behind the irony. The days of wide-eyed fans going to live gigs and lapping up performative flamboyance are long gone; hip thrusts, hair shakes, and intense pouting would mostly be met with an eye roll.
As a cynic myself, however, could I write a list of annoying solos if I wasn’t? Society’s move to a more humorously in-tune state largely pleases me. But I can’t help but feel it’s come at the detriment of one of music’s great pleasures: the solo.
Yeah, sure, they can be the ultimate sign of self-indulgence, but when executed right, they open the door to transcendent musical bliss. But what is a solo done right? Well, firstly, it’s in keeping with the sonic palette of the song. Sure, it needs to veer off into its own separate path, but however winding and long that may be, it always needs to find its way back to the original journey seamlessly. If it does that, it can be as technical and lengthy as it wishes, giving fans a much-needed vortex in which they can detach from reality.
So a solo done wrong is often the antithesis of that. It feels laboured for the very fact that it’s a jarring distraction from everything else in the song. Notes that should be winding and hypnotic end up sounding clunky and make the listener feel as though they are bouncing between the walls of an uncomfortable slide.
But just because it is easy for us as fans to make a distinction between the good and bad doesn’t mean it is for musicians. The very idea that solos have to be self-indulgent makes the risk of losing judgment all the more prevalent, and so some of the all-time greats have fallen into the trap of laying down some shockers. Of all the worst, across all the instruments, here:
Led Zeppelin – ‘Whole Lotta Love’
OK, I’ll admit, the first time I heard this song, and even now when I listen in the right
setting, it has the power to blow my mind.
The infuriating solo I’m talking about is the bridge section, which is made up of a guitar pick dragged on strings, Robert Plant’s sporadic moans and wind sound effects. In the right circumstances, this sounds great and builds into the actual guitar solo well, but in regular circumstances, it’s just a pain in the ass.
You’re listening to your music, enjoying the killer instrumentation and rhythm of Led
Zeppelin, riding guitar lines, excellent vocals, and a rhythm section that seems to play against every rule of rhythm yet still keep time. There is nowhere else you want to be except in that moment. And then boom… It’s the 45-second period of the track where it sounds as though you’re going through a wind tunnel. It’s excellent on the first listen, but for the majority of the time thereafter, it just becomes a pain.